Thursday, February 4, 2010

Day Two

So where were we? Ahhh yes, flyering the shit out of the neighborhood where he said he lives.

Since Roxanne clearly is a wo-man with a plan with unsinkable perseverance, she knew deep down if she wanted a single one of her friends to embark on this outrageous adventure she needed to make it as easy as possible.

Enter: "The Kit."

Naturally, the next step would be to make up a flier kit for her friends in New York to distribute.

This is the package "The Kit" came in:

I know, I know... you're thinking, "The writing is too small! This kit means nothing to me if I can't read it!" Don't worry, I got you (note: this is copied AS IS, I did not make spelling or grammar corrections):


I know I must seem bat-shit crazy, but these were incredible circumstances...just incredible. I can't sleep, or eat or think of anything other than him, and I lost the only way to contact him. Ah, the things we do for love.

So, all you have to do is PLASTER- all (or as many as you possibly can) of these fliers on or near [Second Avenue and 6th street] in Manhattan. I know he lives there.

Do all the Bodegas and Markets, inside and out- ask if you can hang them for a week (?)

Do all the bus stops, light posts, phone booths, apartment buildings, doors...Do three in a row, eye level, stuff like that... just fucking everywhere.

Mainly on Second Avenue between 5th and 6th and between 6th and 7th streets, on both sides of the avenue.

As soon as you can.

Do as much as you can babe, and wish me luck!

I'll let you know of any news.

Thank you

Thank you

Thank you"

So there you have it; no strife stricken set backs letting this love down.

So, you're probably thinking, so what's in "The Kit?"

The kit came armed and so-not-dangerous with plethora of pastel fliers and and your other basic flyering essentials:

Seriously Roxanne-- you win the award for covering ALL the bases. Let's be honest, if someone supplied you with the fliers that's great and all but are you seriously going to go out of your way to find packaging tape? I'll tell you a little something about how this goes with 3 simple options:

1.) Ask your roommate, neighbor, deli counter- anyone that seems like packaging tape may be in their "stuff drawer." And don't you even begin to tell me you don't know what a "stuff drawer" is...

2.) Okay, where is the ONE and ONLY place besides an office supply store that is GUARANTEED to have packaging tape? WORK duh! No matter where you work, I say with strict conviction that your work has packaging tape somewhere on the premises. Screw profit-seeking enterprises as a requirement for a business, if you have packaging tape- you ARE in business. Just please at least have the intention to return it after you use it-- whether or not that actually happens is not my business.

3.) Sorry buddy, your shit isn't going to go up because frankly I am just too lazy to find the stupid tape. Shoot, I don't even own scotch tape!

Well thank goodness for Roxanne and her planning ahead so we didn't have to deal with (warning: lame pun disclosure) "The Tape Debate."

Bringing the contents of the kit to a conclusion, there is one more thing I need to share:

Unfortunately upon arrival of this kit, Lauren was getting ready to leave for a week for a wedding in SF.

...So this is where I come in.

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